40 Life Lessons I Know at 40 (That I Wish I Knew at 20


Introduction:


Today I turn 40.



And oh boy, it’s been a ride! From struggling through my 20s with big dreams and tiny bank balances, to stumbling my way through love, career, friendships, and a thousand late-night life crises—I've collected a backpack full of lessons. Some came gently. Most? Not so much.


So here it is: 40 things I’ve learned in 40 years. I wish someone had told me this when I was 20. But maybe, just maybe, you can learn them now, and save yourself some headaches (and therapy bills).



1. How You Treat Yourself Is How Others Will Treat You


If you talk badly to yourself, others will feel free to do the same. Respect starts at home, inside your head.


2. Respect Is Earned—Not Owed


No one owes you respect just for showing up. You’ve got to show it to get it.


3. Trying > Failing > Regret


The only real failure is doing nothing. Take the shot. At worst, you learn something cool.


4. No One Is Coming to Rescue You


Life isn’t a movie. You’re your own hero. Cape up, friend.


5. Be the Person You Want to Date


Want someone honest, funny, and ambitious? Be that. Or at least try.


6. Small Habits Beat Big Dreams


Everyone has dreams. Winners show up every day—especially when it's boring.


7. Kindness Isn’t Weakness


Be kind anyway. Life is hard for everyone. Even for that grumpy guy at work.


8. Money Won’t Solve Your Self-Worth


You can have a fat bank account and still feel empty. Work on both.


9. Don’t Chase People


If someone makes you guess your worth, walk away. You’re not a puzzle.


10. Sleep Is a Superpower


Pulling all-nighters is cool… until your 30s hit you like a truck. Sleep, hydrate, repeat.



11–20: The Gritty Growth Years


11. Your Parents Were Right About More Than You Think

(But don’t tell them I said that.)



12. Success Feels Lonely Sometimes

Not everyone will cheer for you. That’s okay.



13. You Can’t Change People

You can inspire them, sure. But change? That’s an inside job.



14. Say “No” Without Guilt

Your time and energy are sacred.



15. Travel While You're Young and Poor

That’s when the stories are the best.



16. You Don’t Need to Have It All Figured Out by 30

Anyone who says they do is lying—or in denial.



17. Breakups Aren’t Failures

They’re lessons. Sometimes expensive ones.



18. Be Nice to the Weird Kid—That Might Be You in 10 Years

(Also, weird is wonderful.)



19. Your Job Doesn’t Define You

But it does pay your rent, so don’t slack.



20. Therapy Isn’t Just for “Broken” People

It’s for people who want to grow.




21–30: Love, Loss, and Late-Night Thoughts


21. Love Is a Verb, Not a Noun

It’s what you do, not just what you feel.



22. Not Everyone Will Like You

And that’s a sign you’re doing something right.



23. Learn to Cook at Least 3 Great Meals

Surprisingly impressive. And useful.



24. Laugh at Yourself Often

Life is too short to be serious all the time.



25. Jealousy Is a Mirror

What you envy says a lot about what you want.



26. Friends Will Come and Go

Some are chapters, some are whole books.



27. Grief Never Disappears—It Changes Shape

And you learn to live beside it.



28. Don’t Fear Being Alone

It’s where your real power lives.



29. Apologize First (When You’re Wrong)

It shows strength, not weakness.



30. Celebrate Tiny Wins

Sometimes, getting out of bed is a victory.





31–40: Life, Legacy, and Laughter


31. Dance Even If You’re Terrible

The joy is in the moving, not the perfect steps.



32. Social Media Is a Filtered Lie

Real life is messy—and that’s beautiful.



33. You Can Start Over at Any Age

Seriously. Any. Age.



34. Silence Can Be Golden—And Healing

Sometimes the best answer is no reply.



35. Give More Than You Take

But don’t forget to refill your own cup.



36. Your Health Is Your Real Wealth

Invest early. Your future self will cry with gratitude.



37. Forgive Yourself. Often.

You’re doing your best with what you know.



38. Life Doesn’t Get Easier—You Get Stronger

And wiser. And funnier.



39. The People Who Matter Most? Call Them. Today.

They won’t be around forever.



40. You Are Enough. Right Now. As You Are.

You don’t need to prove your worth. Just live it.





Final Thoughts:


Turning 40 didn’t magically make me wise. But it did make me reflect. Life isn’t about being perfect, rich, or popular. It’s about growth, grit, love, laughter—and learning to be okay with the chaos.


So if you’re 20, 30, or even 60—start now. Be kind. Be brave. And above all, be real.


Because life? It’s a wild, weird, beautiful mess. And you? You’re doing just fine.




Post a Comment

0 Comments